Country Haiku
…Thrillionairess Freda Chaney, 3/10/10
Little chicken man
Holds a handled basket full
Of fresh Bantam eggs
Serpentine sunset
A spring horizon shimmers
And sheds away day
Summer cowbells ring
Milk maids herd the Holsteins home
White foam tops the pails
Jugs full of May wine
Sweet Woodruff steeped in water
Succulent springtime
Stone wall—micro view
Arbutus trails up and down
Star nosed mole struggles
Fire red fall orchard
Children laugh, cling branches and
Snap ripe apples free
Barefoot schoolboy skips
Treasures wrapped in handkerchief
Mischievous spring day
Holds a handled basket full
Of fresh Bantam eggs
Serpentine sunset
A spring horizon shimmers
And sheds away day
Summer cowbells ring
Milk maids herd the Holsteins home
White foam tops the pails
Jugs full of May wine
Sweet Woodruff steeped in water
Succulent springtime
Stone wall—micro view
Arbutus trails up and down
Star nosed mole struggles
Fire red fall orchard
Children laugh, cling branches and
Snap ripe apples free
Barefoot schoolboy skips
Treasures wrapped in handkerchief
Mischievous spring day
UNIQUE ART WINS AWARD [via Joe Anselmo]
This video (link below) shows the winner of 2009's " Ukraine 's Got Talent", Kseniya Simonova, 24, drawing a series of pictures on an illuminated sand table showing how ordinary people were affected by the German invasion during World War II. Her talent, which admittedly is a strange one, is mesmeric to watch.
Senior Road Trip [via Sam Cormier]
While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch.
After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip. When leaving, Mildred unknowingly left her glasses on the table, and she didn't miss them until they had been driving for about forty minutes. By then, to add to the aggravation, they'd have to travel quite a distance before they could find a place to turn around, in order to return to the restaurant to retrieve her glasses.
All the way back, the elderly husband became the classic grouchy old man. He fussed and complained, and scolded Mildred relentlessly during the entire return drive. The more he chided her, the more agitated he became. He just wouldn't let up for a single minute. To her relief, they finally arrived at the restaurant. As the woman got out of the car, and hurried inside to retrieve her glasses, Bill yelled to her, "While you're in there, you might as well get my hat and the credit card."
After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant, and resumed their trip. When leaving, Mildred unknowingly left her glasses on the table, and she didn't miss them until they had been driving for about forty minutes. By then, to add to the aggravation, they'd have to travel quite a distance before they could find a place to turn around, in order to return to the restaurant to retrieve her glasses.
All the way back, the elderly husband became the classic grouchy old man. He fussed and complained, and scolded Mildred relentlessly during the entire return drive. The more he chided her, the more agitated he became. He just wouldn't let up for a single minute. To her relief, they finally arrived at the restaurant. As the woman got out of the car, and hurried inside to retrieve her glasses, Bill yelled to her, "While you're in there, you might as well get my hat and the credit card."
KOALAS ASKING FOR WATER [via Nina Reznick]
LOST IN HOT AIR [via Nina Reznick]
A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
"She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be an Obama Democrat."
"I am,” replied the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."
The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Republican."
"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault."
The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.
"She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be an Obama Democrat."
"I am,” replied the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."
The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Republican."
"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"
"Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it's my fault."
WHICH WAY IS THE BUS HEADING?
I already knew I was dumber than a fifth grader...but now it's the preschoolers!
A PRE-SCHOOL TEST FOR YOU
Which way is the bus below traveling? To the left or to the right?
Can't make up your mind? Look carefully at the picture again.
Still don't know?
Pre-schoolers all over the United States were shown this picture and asked the same question.
90% of the pre-schoolers gave this answer.
"The bus is traveling to the left."
When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling to the left?"
They answered:
"Because you can't see the door to get on the bus."
How do you feel now ???
I know, me too.
Have a nice day
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