I
used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of
natural causes.
Can
you cry under water?
How
important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated
instead of just murdered?
Why
do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it’s only a "penny
for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going?
Once
you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for
eternity?
What
disease did cured ham actually have?
How
is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea
to put wheels on luggage?
Why
is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
like every two hours?
If
a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why
are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?
Why
do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look
at things on the ground?
Why
do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked
anyway.
Why
is “bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why
do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp,
which no decent human being would eat?
Can
a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
If
the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can’t
he fix a hole in a boat?
If
corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is
baby oil made from?
If
electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why
do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why
did you just try singing the two songs above?
Did
you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but
when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
HOW
DID THE MAN WHO MADE THE FIRST CLOCK, KNOW WHAT TIME IT WAS?
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